Blogging · vinyl apparel

218. How to… use a crutch without relying on one.

To say I have been exhausted lately would be an understatement. I don’t even really know how to put into words everything that has been going on, but it’s been an incredibly long couple of days. Or weeks. The house hunt thing took a pause because we were told there was supposedly an issue that would make my down payment hilariously higher than what I’d planned for. I will say I’ve recently discovered that’s not the case, so that’s some good news. I’ve spent most of the last couple weeks going back and forth to various doctors and trying to get my PCP to actually listen.

Plot twist: She still isn’t, but my NP and the rest of my treatment team are finally listening, and that has meant I’ve been spending the last couple weeks going back and forth to the doc (and will be continuing this trend for the next couple of weeks as well). I’m frustrated and absolutely exhausted, but at the same time also so glad that something is finally being done, because it’s about damn time.

Monday I start therapy to help the swelling in my leg. Next week, I also go in for an MRA/MRV and an MRI of my head, then an EEG. Therapy will be three days a week until the swelling is sorted out. I may be back on my crutches for a little bit to keep the pressure of my leg – but I’m trying to avoid that. My neurologist increased the dosage on my seizure meds and got everything else squared away. I’ll be wearing an alert bracelet now – something I’ve avoided. Still not a peep from the doc, but like I said – the rest of the team is taking action, and that’s all I can ask for.

I’ve spent most of my life in stubborn mode, trying to sort out ways that I can do things on my own without somehow causing issue for other people or needing some kind of crutch – which is kind of ironic since i have actual forearm crutches I’m supposed to use when I’m tired. I don’t, but… Something that this last couple weeks has taught me is that it’s okay to be tired and it’s okay to need a little extra help and actually accept it from time to time. It’s okay to need that crutch – the thing is not to become dependent on it. Ask for help when you need it. Do what you have to do. But… everything in moderation. That’s my motto, anyway.

Credits:

[Shape]mine
[Head][LeLUTKA]Avalon
[Body][Signature]Alice
[Skin][Eudora Beauty]Amber (Medium)
[Hair][Doux]Lauren
[Brows][A R T E]Rebel Eyebrow
[Top][Vinyl]Tokyo Tied Top (originally @ FLF Birthday Bash)
[Jeans][Vinyl]Bodega Jeans

[Pose][Foxcity]from Sits v3

[Tune][Dido – White Flag]

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