151. It’s okay to not be okay sometimes…

So, the other day, I got a new phone. I was all excited because there was this whole ordeal where my order got cancelled and I had to go to the store to pick the phone up. I got it home, and started the process of transferring my data over. The only contact that transferred over was the contact card of an ex of mine who died unexpectedly in 2018. I didn’t even have her contact card in my phone anymore because we were still friends, and it was difficult to see it for a while afterwards, especially after she died. Her parents were in denial about who she was, and refused to acknowledge that and many of us who knew and loved her.

So here I am, minding my own business and excited about having this new phone and this new service so people will actually be able to hear me when I speak to them, and I open it up, and the only name in my contact list was hers.

And I’m going to be honest. I sat there for a minute, and I stared at it. I tried to rationalize that I had to know someone else for which I used that nickname. So I opened it. And there was a picture of her dog. And I lost it. I spent a great deal of the rest of that evening eating stuff that was bad for me and watching funny anime and ugly crying for no reason, because that’s what I needed to do at that point in time.

Unfortunately, the rest of the week was just about as much a train wreck as Monday was. The tree I ordered to decorate for Christmas was out-of-stock. My laptop for work? Lost in the Twilight Zone somewhere. In both cases, those items were re-ordered and the theoretical crisis presented by their absence was, in effect, averted, but at that point, it was the principle of the matter.

At some point, when you’re in one of those times in life where things are a bit of a rollercoaster and it’s doing too many loopty-loops but all you can do is strap in and hope you don’t vomit everywhere, there’s always that point. That point where you find yourself saying, “You know what? No. Nope. This is some bullsh*t.” And you get angry. And you get frustrated.

My family is full of people who think it’s “ridiculous” for adults to get upset like this. Children cry, you see. Adults are supposed to be more mature than that. But that, my friends, is also bullsh*t. Know why? Because when life is giving you hell, it’s perfectly okay to not be okay. It’s perfectly acceptable to lose your composure from time to time, to cry when you need to, or to simply tell people to leave you the hell alone for a few days. We’re adults, after all. We’re not superheroes. And the worst part is I know I’m not alone in regards to this stigma. I hear it discussed all the time in discussion groups in SL. I hear it from friends and other family members…. This mentality that we simply have to grin and bear it all the time because anything else would be considered unacceptable.

But… why?

It’s okay to not be okay sometimes. And it’s okay to let yourself feel those emotions and express them when you’re not. We need to distance ourselves from this idea that everything has to be fine all the time. It doesn’t. It can’t be. That’s literally impossible. So when you’re having a bad day, keep that in mind. It doesn’t matter if it’s something in real life or if you’re just frustrated to tears because you’ve been an orange cloud for four days and you have things you want to do and places you want to go in SL. It doesn’t matter. Let yourself be okay with having a bad day. Get it out, take some deep breaths, and hope that the next one will be better.

That’s all we can do.

Credits:

[Shape]mine
[Head][LeLUTKA]Nova v 2.5
[Body][Maitreya]Lara 5.2
[Skin][[ session ]]Astrid (tone 2)
[Hair][Doux]Ciara
[Lips][Top1 Salon]HD Excuse Me Lipstick (Nude Pale set)
[Face][Izzie’s]I’m not feeling very well
[Dress][ChicModa]Carlie

[Pose][Diversion]Lean 4

[Tune][Eric Clapton – Heaven]