Blogging · SL Survival Guide

94. How to… hold on.

Life can be a bumpy, horrible ride sometimes, but we’ve only got one, so at the end of the day, we have to try our best to live our best life… even when it’s trying to kick us in the face. And you know what? This applies to Second Life as much as it does to real life.

I’ve met so many people in SL. Some of them will no doubt be life-long friends. Some of them are more than that – they’re family. Some have broken my heart… and others have helped it to heal.

I’ve lost people in real life and in Second Life. A couple of years ago, a very good friend of mine went into the hospital for a routine procedure and never came out. He’d been like a father to me, and he had been through so much in his life. We connected initially when we were both members of an inter-faith discussion forum. I reminded him of his daughter, he said. Not long after we met, his daughter died. I stayed up late chatting with him so much, listening to stories about her, what a wonderful person she was even though she struggled so much and had to fight so hard. It was cancer. When I got the news that he’d passed, I was logged into Second Life at the time, talking to Master Leylan (yes, I’m one of those) and I lost it. He called me immediately, talked me through it, shared a few things to lift my spirits, and just sat with me until I calmed down.

You know… it’s funny, because at that point, I don’t even think we were in a relationship yet, but he still dropped everything to just talk to me. To get me through that shitty moment where the shock and the pain took over and I didn’t know how to handle it. But the thing is… the thing is… it wasn’t the first time that man had stepped up to help me heal, even when he was dealing with his own… stuff. He’s a cancer survivor, see, so he’s been through the rabbit hole and back again a few times, and he’s such a good man. He’s always putting his concern for others at the front of things. He’s just such a force of nature. I’ve said it before, but I guess at some point I convinced myself that he was just… fucking invincible.

But he’s not. None of us are. And the more I think about having to confront that, the more scared I get, because I never really let myself imagine a time when I wouldn’t be able to talk to him when I needed to, and I know that’s dumb, and maybe a little selfish, but… it is what it is. Last night I reached out just to see how he’s doing because he goes back to the doctor soon, and of course, he turned it back around. He does that. It’s… it’s what he does. And it got me really thinking about just how much this one man has helped me through in the last… six or seven years? And what a huge impact he’s had, and how he took care of me, and tried to guide me, even when I wasn’t sure I couldn’t do it myself.

For real, y’all. People like that… they’re rare as hell in both worlds. And if you manage to be lucky enough to find one of them? A few? You hold on to those people, and you cherish them, and you learn from them, and let them help you grow. And at the end of it all, you may still have a few scars, but you’ll come out the other end of the tunnel a better person. A stronger person. A more patient person.

I am forever grateful for that. Something like this has never hit quite so close to home for me in SL, though, so I’m trying to deal, and wait, and be strong, and hope for the best, and keep it all together, and… so many things. I’m trying to keep living my best life, because sometimes, that’s the only thing we can do for the people we care about. So I’m going to do that, and I’m going to cheer for him and take some deep breaths and hope for the best and hold on tight… because life sure as hell makes some crazy loops sometimes, and I can’t fall off the ride right now.


[Shape][Divine Transformations]Nova Shape **custom**
[Head][LeLUTKA]Simone v. 3.4
[Body][Belleza]Freya 5.0
[Hair][Tram]J0116a hair (Hud C)
[Skin][The Skinnery]Paris (Toffee)
[Lips][Izzie’s]Matte Love Lipstick
[Tears][Izzie’s]Lelutka Tears Applier
[Dress][Tres Blah]Aviva Dress (Spring)

[Pose][Foxcity]Lean-3 (Standing)

[Location][The Burrow Coffee & Whiskey Co.]

[Tune][Ariana Grande – One Last Time]

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