So, last night, my friend and I were rambling on as we sometimes do, and we got onto the subject of kids. Don’t ask me how we got there, because it probably involved a few strange left turns and a brief foray into the kind of topics that would make interesting comic book fodder… but we were there, and of course, Big Brother Facebook managed to penetrate my skull with its lasers just long enough to flood my Facebook feed with ads for fertility clinics and adoption agencies with smiling interracial couples and clouds and shit. So, I had a moment where I got into my feels. I have those on occasion, I suppose, and more so lately I think because while that is an area of my life that feels so completely out of my control, most everything else usually is in some form or fashion. Except not lately. We’re not supposed to go out. We can’t really socialize, can’t see the doctors properly; I can’t even take my dog to the groomer right now, and while that is starting to change, everything lately has felt like a nightmare wherein the last several months have somehow stolen several years away and there’s nothing that we can do but sit back and watch, and that… sucks.
So I had a moment last night where I got into my feelings about it a little bit, and my friend – bless her heart – let me vent, and shared stories of her own struggles with me, and gave me a little pick-me-up, and reminded me that everything was going to be alright…and that I had a pretty freaking fantastic friend to lean on when it wasn’t. And the thing about it is, I wouldn’t have met her if not for this game. I wouldn’t have met a lot of you, really, but it’s rare to find someone that you can simply talk with – no matter what it is – and know that regardless, that person is still going to have your back when it’s all said and done. For me, it’s a bit scary, because if I’m completely honest, I’d kind of forgotten what it was like to have someone like that in my life. I’d become so used to smiling all the time, watching what I said and to whom I said it. I found myself examining ways to avoid certain people and certain topics and stay pressed as closely to the wall as I could manage because that was the best way to keep moving forward – albeit slowly – without causing some huge explosion that would up-end my life and create the kind of discord I can’t stand.
And realizing that I don’t have to do that anymore? It’s better than chocolate, guys.
Just remember when you’re having one of those days, especially now, that you can let those walls down. It’s okay to not be okay sometimes, and anyone who tries to tell you or make you feel otherwise is not someone that you need in your life. It’s okay to laugh, or cry when you need to. It’s okay to admit that you need help. It’s okay to answer with something other than, “I’m alright,” when someone asks you how you’re doing. There is always someone who will listen, lend you a shoulder, and offer words of encouragement when you need them.
And hell… if you need someone like that, if you’re going through a rough patch, I’d be more than happy to be that person for you. Sometimes, all we need is a friend like that to remind us that not everything is gray skies.
Credits:
[Shape][Divine Transformations]Nova Shape **custom**
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I Promise I Know What I'm Doing 