I think one of the hardest things that we will ever learn in either life is the concept of self-love… the idea that we value ourselves and know our own worth beyond what is ascribed to us by other people. I’ve touched on this several times in this blog and tried to encourage everyone reading it to be the weird, out-of-the-box, slightly crazy individuals that they are… and I think the reason that I touch on this so often is that there was a time when I didn’t like myself very much. There was a time when I would look into the mirror and I didn’t recognize the person staring back at me. And, there was a time when I thought that if I did the things that others wanted me to do, the things that other people seemed to expect me to do, that the empty feeling I got when I looked at that stranger in the mirror would go away.
Plot twist: It didn’t.
The song that inspired this post has been stuck in my head since last night, so I felt the need to touch on it again. When I was in that dark place, it didn’t matter what I did to myself, what I did to try to fit in. Nothing filled that hole. You can buy the latest fashions and put on a mask all day long, but at the end of the day, all of that has to come off. At the end of the day, you can’t pretend to be okay, because all that’s left is the barest, most intimate, most true version of yourself… and if you can’t look at her in the mirror, all of that other stuff? It’s going to remain, and it will keep getting worse. It doesn’t fix itself. Eventually, there will come a time when it’s not just the girl in the mirror you don’t recognize. The one walking around will be a stranger, too.
You can’t let that happen.
Inside all of us is this beautiful, amazing, talented soul with gifts to share and love to give and light to shine upon the world. And you have to learn to love her. You have to learn to love her because until the day you can look into that mirror and smile at the girl that is looking back at you, you’ll be stagnant. That day will be the day you know your worth. That day will be the day you realize how important being comfortable in your own skin really is. That day will be the day that you realize you don’t need someone else to tell you how to feel, act or look… that you can love yourself, scars and all, without anyone else’s help.
That will be the day that you are free.
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