Blogging · SL Survival Guide · vinyl apparel

30. How to… find your jam.

Sometimes, people simply don’t think. Now, before you start throwing tomatoes, let me unpack that a little bit. I want to start off by saying I don’t necessarily apply any of what I’m about to say to all people. But… if the shoe fits, lace that thing up and wear it, I guess.

I find myself utterly baffled sometimes by how people behave. We are all adults, and yet there are days when I know I have things to do here in SL, and I’ll sit and hover over that ‘log in’ button while mentally doing the math to figure out just how long I can put off whatever the thing is I have to do. There are days when I know I am on a deadline and I know something has to be done, and I’ll still try and convince myself otherwise, or find myself wishing my brand new computer would just burst into flames, or that I could simply be sucked into my favorite book and never heard from again.

And it’s not for lack of entertainment. It’s the fact that sometimes SL, my real-life getaway, my favored social platform, my little bit of fun in my dumpster fire life, is tainted. Sometimes, when people are unhappy, they want everyone around them to be unhappy. This is true in real life and in Second Life, where despite the ability to fly, teleport, build, do, and be whatever you want, there are still people who have to find something wrong with everything, who think the world may stop spinning if they don’t get their way, or that somehow everything is about them always, regardless of what others may be thinking, feeling, or going through.

And I just don’t have enough spoons for that, y’all. I don’t think a normal person has enough spoons to deal with that. Plus, this is Second Life. It’s supposed to be fun and relaxing.

I know we’ve all been there. We probably all know at least one person who fits the bill, right? But that’s the thing. This isn’t real life. This is not your smelly know-it-all coworker in the next cubicle over. You don’t have to deal with that kind of negativity. Hell, I’m the kind of person who doesn’t tolerate it in real life. I’ve literally packed my stuff, smiled, and walked out of a job for being treated poorly and having to deal with too much stress. Know why? Because that shit’s not good for you. It’s bad for your health. Super bad, actually. And you can always find something new and probably better, too.

But this same formula applies to people. You don’t have to surround yourself with negativity all the time. You are a fabulous human being perfectly capable of making new friends. Especially in Second Life. One of my new old friends lives in another country. We never would have met if not for this platform. Use it. You don’t have to hang up your coat after a long shitty day in real life and log in and wade through more shit in your virtual one.

Sometimes, when I find myself feeling that twinge of frustration, when I fear that if I try to keep my mouth shut any longer I may accidentally break my own jaw in the process, I take a step back, and I find something to listen to. Music. It’s always music. It’s always been and always will be music… but the song differs depending on the day, really. Music helps me unwind, re-think and re-group, and pulls me right back to my zen space.

More and more lately, I have started to realize the benefit of not allowing that kind of negativity in my personal bubble. Sometimes, that simply means changing up a routine. Sometimes, it’s making new friends and finding new hobbies. Sometimes, it’s just doing that thing that you do that allows you to take an actual breath.

Haters are always going to be haters… but that doesn’t mean you have to tolerate it. Find you jam, switch it up, and the world will open up.

Credits:

[Shape][Divine Transformations]Nova Shape **custom**
[Head][LeLUTKA]Simone v. 3.4
[Body][Belleza]Freya 5.0
[Hair][Tram]I1126b hair (Hud C)
[Skin][The Skinnery]Paris (Toffee)
[Top][Vinyl]Anne Ruched top (green moss)
[Jeans][Vinyl]Alexis Jeans (dark blue)

[Pose][Del May Poses]Sad reflection

[Piano][Nutmeg]Distressed Grand Piano
[Books][Kalopsia]Jack’s books
[Book w/ Rose][*{{konpeitou}}*]beauty and the book w/rose
[Notebook][Cheeky Pea]composition notebook
[Papers][floorplan]scattered sheet music
[Vase][Apple Fall]Pheasant Feathers
[Plant][Loft&Aria]Juniper Potted Banana Plant (brass)
[Lamp][Kalopsia]Book pile lamp
[Shelf+Accessories][Apple Fall]Frame shelf

[Tune][Miley Cyrus – Look What They’ve Done to My Song]

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